Desperately Seeking Carwash


So once we made our way out of beautiful Kellogg, Idaho, home of the shittiest motel rooms very little money can buy, we made our way to Bozeman, Montana.

“Why Bozeman?” you may wonder. I did also wonder that myself, but it turned out that we needed to visit the Museum of the Rockies. It’s quite a nice museum there at the university and it features a lot of dinosaur fossils. And one of the sprogs is way into paleontology.

The anonymous (middle) child takes a medication that has been upsetting her stomach. This, along with a tendency to get carsick, and further combined with a proclivity to have her face buried in her phone, led to an unfortunate incident the occurred as we made our way East, an incident that we shall call: The Pukening.

So if anyone needed an explanation of why the passenger side exterior of the Rental Minivan of Justice suddenly featured a plume of chunder all down the length of it, there you go.

Naturally we sprang into action, largely motivated by self preservation as we drove with all our heads out the window — except the poor unfortunate youngest child, who was trapped in the back seat of the RMoJ. The windows back there do not open. And she was downwind.

I’m pretty sure we defied the laws of physics getting into the nearest gas station where Barfy was able to go wash up and the rest of us dealt with the aftermath. Well, some of us did. Some of us scrubbed vomit off the side of the car with the window washing squeegee while others pumped gas into the car. But some of us aren’t bitter.

(Narrator: some of us are bitter.)

After some comprehensive scrubbing of the inside of the van door with disinfecting wipes, we motored cautiously on, and in due time we arrived in Bozeman where we stayed at a really perfectly adequate Comfort Inn.

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