Fever ‘n Ague

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So last week The Lovely Rhonda came down with some kind of grippe.  It seized her by the scruff of the immune system and shook her like a terrier shakes a rat.  It wasn’t pretty.

The next day, it came for me.  Even less pretty, it must be said.

And so I spent Thursday in bed.  In. Bed.  I do not lay abed for anything, except pneumonia last fall.  So you can safely assume I felt fully wretched.

The fevery part of it departed fairly quickly and by Friday evening I felt almost human again.  Except I lost my voice.  This had happened to TLR a day earlier, so it made sense.  We tried to back out of an Obligation that we had made, but alas, there was no one else to do it so we pressed on.  One cannot stand up the church, and we have the reputation among the charity-auction circuit for being efficient and accurate when it comes to the cashiering process, which is complicated and takes place in a huge rush of semi-irritable people trying to get home.  They have dressed up and given generously and now they want to get back to whatever it is that people watch on TV these days.  I can’t blame them.

Sunday was fairly uneventful except that we both still felt terrible, but then Sunday night TLR coughed and coughed until I forced a Chloraseptic lozenge on her.

I love the word lozenge.  It’s so specific.  And it has a z in it and sounds kind of exotic.  Not just a hard candy, no!  It’s a lozenge!  And then you must present it with a flourish.

At any rate, this lozenge helped her, and thus was I the hero once again.

No really, it was nothing.  *preens*

Anyway, I spaced off that you really can’t take Sudafed if you want to sleep at night, so last night I tossed and turned.  Eventually I realized that I was also rubbing my eye, and it was unpleasant, and I woke up to full-blown pinkeye.  As did TLR.

Also?  My head felt all ‘splody.

So today we visited The Best Nurse Practitioner Ever, who was kind and decent and decided that we had not just pinkeye but most likely bacterial pinkeye because we both have sinus infections and I myself am flirting with ear infections as well.  (So far just a bit of slap-and-tickle, but you know how fresh these out-of-towners can get.)

So we got antibiotics and eye drops.

I’m a huge fan of antibiotics, used wisely and judiciously, and based on the sheer misery of the past five days I’m going to declare this a wise and judicious use of them.  That being said, I’m also allergic to a lot of the really common ones, so when I get sick with this kind of thing I’m often prescribed Keflex.  This is a cephalosporin and you have to take it fifty times a day for months.  Okay, four times a day for up to two weeks.  By the end of the two weeks you can’t remember why you were ever taking it in the first place, and if one of the capsules ruptures on its way down you’ll be coughing up a dusty cloud of evil all day.  Needless to say I take it with a lot of water.

But!  Then they invented the Z-Pak!  Which is azithromycin, and you only take two tablets the first day and then one per day for three days after that.  Hurrah!

So… for pinkeye they commonly give a sulfa-based eye drop.  Guess who’s allergic to sulfa?

YES, THAT WOULD BE ME.

Guess how much sulfa eye drops cost, and where you can get them?

Four bucks, and practically everywhere.

Guess how much azithromycin eye drops cost, and where  you can get them?

FIFTY DOLLARS, and — oddly enough — Costco.

So it was that I spent half an hour wandering around Costco waiting to buy eye drops.   I tried not to touch stuff, but if you hear about a massive pinkeye epidemic over by the airport, I KNOW NOTHING AND WAS NEVER THERE.

By the way, they have a nice deal on fluorescent light bulbs right now.

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