They like me! They really like me!


So I got hired at .6 FTE at one of the places I work oncall.

I have to tell you, friends and neighbors, the relief I feel is almost palpable.  Sweet, slightly sticky, and smelling faintly of vanilla and cinnamon.  Yes, relief is basically the emotional equivalent of a Cinnabon.  No longer will I have to scrounge up three shifts a week, or worry about getting sick and missing a whole week of work (which happened recently and cost us hundreds of dollars).

It is a night shift, which isn’t ideal, but on the bright side the shifts are on good days for me schedule wise and there is that tasty five-bucks-an-hour differential to wallow in.

I’m just going to blow my own horn for a minute too.  Today I finished up my training in admissions.  Admitting a patient to detox is really not that terribly complicated, in my opinion.  You fill out some paperwork, sit with the client and ask a shitload of questions, and then decide whether to medicate them for any of their detox symptoms.  You send them back to the special waiting room (where they watch movies on a nice big flat-screen tv and are given snacks or lunch while they wait) and finish their paperwork, call report to subacute, and hand their finished documents to the clerks who put it into a chart for you.

People, this is not hard.  The most challenging part is remembering to put their vital signs in about four different places.  Oh, and placing TB test injections.  It ain’t rocket surgery.

Generally, I was told, a newbie such as myself would be given one intake to do and depending on how badly they screwed that up, they might — might — be given a second.

Naturally, because I am Slightly Above Average ™, I did three.  And still got out of there half an hour early.  Even with the construction-snarled traffic that made me twenty minutes late getting back from lunch.

But, it’s not like I’m a real nurse.  🙂


One response »

  1. Probably I should also mention that occasionally someone comes in who is severely dehydrated or in some other way medically unstable, and it is up to the triage nurse to determine if they should go to the ER before admission to the program. It’s not like they’re all in great health and haven’t been spending the past few days, weeks, months or even years putting harmful substances into their bodies….

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